It's All In the Eyes: How to Navigate LGBT Style in Shanghai
Stereotypically, the men will be thin, immaculately dressed and coiffed, the women burly and swathed in flannel and denim. In Shanghai, however, these antiquated notions of sexuality and dress get thrown out the window. How, then, are we expected to find each other on the streets or discover possible partners while out and about outside the sanctum of the gay bars?
I don't think I have ever seen a lesbian wear flannel here. In fact, I dress much more like a stereotypical lesbian than any of the city's actual lady lovers. The style of the sapphic set is as varied as its members―hair on average is a bit shorter and dresses a bit rarer, but overall you'd be hard-pressed to pick one out of a line-up. The only real common trait is short fingernails (if you think about it long enough you'll figure out why). On the other hand, a trip into the Metro yields dozens of girls in skinny jeans and oversized flannels with lens-less black plastic glasses, looking like total tomboys minus the fact that they're also draped over their boyfriends in what I assume is some heterosexual display of affection (shudder).
The thin, effeminate reeds nancing across the TV screen whenever a show feels obliged to have a gay character are far from demonstrative of what you'll actually find at a gay bar. An evening out reveals that many varieties of gay fashion exist, from the buffest of the buff―whose fashion sense is hard to judge since they never seem to be wearing a shirt (not that I'm complaining)―to the odd suit or fashion plate, with the most common outfit being—gasp—T-shirt and jeans. At the same time, a walk through Xujiahui on any given Sunday yields hoards of men in harem pants, hair and skin both groomed to photo-shoot levels of perfection and man-bags far fiercer than girlfriends' purses.
So what's a gayer to do, since fashion isn't an obvious clue as to whom to hit on? It took me three days of thinking I had somehow won the gay lottery to realize that it was acceptable for men who weren't gay to wear clothing without a Nascar logo.
The secret, I've finally concluded, is in the eyes. If you're talking to someone you're dying to date and can't quite put your finger on his or her persuasion, follow that person's eyes. When a hottie walks by, your paramour will inevitably give a second glance if playing for the same team. The only other solution is to ask, because that tends to work really well, too.
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